As a rule, I try to live my life with my eyes wide open to my surroundings. I attempt to live out my faith and come along side those who are hurting because I know that is what Jesus calls me to do and because I feel most alive and full of joy when I love people the way Jesus loves me. In some way I feel like I am being healed as well in the process because I am learning to step out of my comfort zone and reach out and allow myself to be vulnerable.
Today my eyes were overwhelmed and it reminded me of the trips I have taken to Africa. My eyes were just visually overloaded at all that was before me; so many people with hurting eyes and so many needs and I knew it was just a small fraction of the homeless in Minnesota let alone the United States.
I found myself looking at the pavement at times and needing to take small breaks- needing to process it all. One particular story about a man whose parents kicked him out of the home when he was 14 years old hit me really hard today as he described to me the situation that caused him to be homeless for a time.
It was like a knife in my heart because my mom kicked me out about 2 months after I turned 16 even though it was against my dad's wishes. I was fortunate my grandparents took me in or I would have probably run away and ended up homeless myself.
The reality is homelessness happens for a variety of reasons. We need to care and we need to start living with Eyes Wide Open. It is not a stretch to say that any one of us could end up in this position given a few bad events that we had no control over. We have to decide to start seeing people, reaching out, loving, listening, sharing, and caring. We also need to step out in faith. God doesn't take you to places without equipping you. Let go of the fear; fear is not of God.
You never know how God is going to use your willingness to follow Him. Because of my willingness today, He brought a difficult memory bundled with suppressed feelings to the surface in order order to aide in healing through the story of homelessness.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Love and Staples
Today I decided that I needed to "hit the ground running" and get some things done that I have had on my mind for a new ministry that God created: Bag the Cold.
I needed to run some errands and bring my really cute sidekick Ariana with me.
Before we left I explained that we were going to make signs so that people will know where they can donate sleeping bags and other items for the homeless. Which led to her having questions. She asked, "Doesn't God give everyone a home mama?" I explained that we have to work and pay for our homes every month, and that it can be really hard to do that if a problem comes up like you get sick, have lost your job, etc. I think she was starting to understand what I was saying and then she said, "That makes my heart hurt mama."
I just sat there, stunned. "It really makes my heart hurt too honey."
I get her ready to go and in the car. We go to Staples and while I am there I call my husband to get logo e-mailed to my phone so then I can e-mail it to the store using my phone all the while trying to manage figuring out what sign I need and answering questions about the flavors of suckers next to the register that my Dollie is asking me. It was a little hectic and I am not so great with the whole techie thing.
The sweet lady working there just comes to my rescue. She gets paper and markers for Ariana to draw, she waits patiently for e-mails to come through, she is super sweet with all the pictures Ariana needs to show her, answers a bazillion questions of Ariana's, lets Ariana come behind the counter and "help" laminate, plays a quick tic-tac-toe game with her, and acts amazed that she can put her jacket on a special way and zip it by herself.
During this time of entertaining my daughter and helping me with my 15 signs, she asked a lot about Bag the Cold, Breakthrough Ministries, and the homeless. It was amazing!
I was stunned. What an incredibly nice person! All the while she was handling other customers with grace. This is the BEST customer service I've ever received. My 5 year old daughter left feeling special and I was so grateful for such kindness.
God reached out today and loved on me and my little girl big time~ through a really beautiful person at Staples.
What a treasure. Let us all strive to be that kind of person.
I needed to run some errands and bring my really cute sidekick Ariana with me.
Before we left I explained that we were going to make signs so that people will know where they can donate sleeping bags and other items for the homeless. Which led to her having questions. She asked, "Doesn't God give everyone a home mama?" I explained that we have to work and pay for our homes every month, and that it can be really hard to do that if a problem comes up like you get sick, have lost your job, etc. I think she was starting to understand what I was saying and then she said, "That makes my heart hurt mama."
I just sat there, stunned. "It really makes my heart hurt too honey."
I get her ready to go and in the car. We go to Staples and while I am there I call my husband to get logo e-mailed to my phone so then I can e-mail it to the store using my phone all the while trying to manage figuring out what sign I need and answering questions about the flavors of suckers next to the register that my Dollie is asking me. It was a little hectic and I am not so great with the whole techie thing.
The sweet lady working there just comes to my rescue. She gets paper and markers for Ariana to draw, she waits patiently for e-mails to come through, she is super sweet with all the pictures Ariana needs to show her, answers a bazillion questions of Ariana's, lets Ariana come behind the counter and "help" laminate, plays a quick tic-tac-toe game with her, and acts amazed that she can put her jacket on a special way and zip it by herself.
During this time of entertaining my daughter and helping me with my 15 signs, she asked a lot about Bag the Cold, Breakthrough Ministries, and the homeless. It was amazing!
I was stunned. What an incredibly nice person! All the while she was handling other customers with grace. This is the BEST customer service I've ever received. My 5 year old daughter left feeling special and I was so grateful for such kindness.
God reached out today and loved on me and my little girl big time~ through a really beautiful person at Staples.
What a treasure. Let us all strive to be that kind of person.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Intentionally Broken
This winter has been very harsh here in MN.
EVERY time I have had to get in my car it's so cold I can barely stand waiting for the car to warm up or to be cold long enough to buckle my daughter in her car seat. I have resented living h here.
I usually handle winters better, reminding myself that this is the season where life slows down a little bit and you can drink warm beverages and go sledding and let the kids enjoy the snow.
I'm usually the one trying to get my trim hubby out in it- encouraging him to just put on a few more layers and move around.
Not this winter. THIS winter I have been broken.
Broken hearted over it.
God started whispering in my ear. "Can you imagine being homeless here in MN right now, Amy?" "Can you imagine what it would feel like in -25 to -35 below with windchill even for 5 minutes?" "Would you be tempted to drink a bottle of booze instead of eating food with that $5 just to numb the pain?"
"How can you complain about feeling cold when you have a house, a heater?" What if you didn't have a home?" "What if you were homeless and lucky enough to have a car to live out of but no money for gas to heat it?"
God kept popping these questions into my head. And I was breaking apart.
CONVICTED, BROKEN, HURTING for my brothers and sisters.
I felt hopeless to the problem. "What can I do?" "Lord, THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!"
I feel angry that this problem even exits in MN. I think it's totally unacceptable and was telling God this.
I was angry hearing that tents and makeshift homes get stashed.
"What can we do God so people don't freeze?"
He Answered: "Collect below zero sleeping bags."
"OK LORD I WILL."
I said yes to God Jan 20th. Since then He has taken over and birthed Bag the Cold, a ministry to provide sleeping bags and other items needed to bring warmth to our homeless brothers and sisters.
After I said "YES LORD" Josh Wilson's new song "I Refuse" came on the radio. I cried the whole way home.
I was intentionally broken this winter. It is a winter I will never forget.
Thank you God for helping me see what hurts you. Thanks Lord for everything.
EVERY time I have had to get in my car it's so cold I can barely stand waiting for the car to warm up or to be cold long enough to buckle my daughter in her car seat. I have resented living h here.
I usually handle winters better, reminding myself that this is the season where life slows down a little bit and you can drink warm beverages and go sledding and let the kids enjoy the snow.
I'm usually the one trying to get my trim hubby out in it- encouraging him to just put on a few more layers and move around.
Not this winter. THIS winter I have been broken.
Broken hearted over it.
God started whispering in my ear. "Can you imagine being homeless here in MN right now, Amy?" "Can you imagine what it would feel like in -25 to -35 below with windchill even for 5 minutes?" "Would you be tempted to drink a bottle of booze instead of eating food with that $5 just to numb the pain?"
"How can you complain about feeling cold when you have a house, a heater?" What if you didn't have a home?" "What if you were homeless and lucky enough to have a car to live out of but no money for gas to heat it?"
God kept popping these questions into my head. And I was breaking apart.
CONVICTED, BROKEN, HURTING for my brothers and sisters.
I felt hopeless to the problem. "What can I do?" "Lord, THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!"
I feel angry that this problem even exits in MN. I think it's totally unacceptable and was telling God this.
I was angry hearing that tents and makeshift homes get stashed.
"What can we do God so people don't freeze?"
He Answered: "Collect below zero sleeping bags."
"OK LORD I WILL."
I said yes to God Jan 20th. Since then He has taken over and birthed Bag the Cold, a ministry to provide sleeping bags and other items needed to bring warmth to our homeless brothers and sisters.
After I said "YES LORD" Josh Wilson's new song "I Refuse" came on the radio. I cried the whole way home.
I was intentionally broken this winter. It is a winter I will never forget.
Thank you God for helping me see what hurts you. Thanks Lord for everything.
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